THE FIRST FIVE THINGS YOU NEED TO DO TO START PLANNING YOUR WEDDING

advice from Karina Crockett of Magnolia Affairs,

a wedding planner with over 10 years of experience.

Photo by Rebecca Love Photography

1- Celebrate! Unless you have a reason to rush into wedding planning- don't! Fiancé is so fun to say and you only get to say it for a short amount of time. Enjoy this stage and the bliss that comes with it!

Okay, once you are really ready to start planning the first step is to:

2- Determine a rough location where you want to get married. This could also be narrowed down to your top 2 places if you want to compare. Is it your hometown? Is it a destination wedding abroad? A destination wedding within the US? As a wedding planner on Nantucket 95% of my weddings are considered destination couples.

Photo by Zofia

3- Talk about the budget. Who is contributing. What are you comfortable with. Please note that what your wedding budget “gets you” is largely dependent on your location - just like a house. A four bedroom house in northern Maine is not going to cost the same as a four bedroom house in Nantucket. Many of the published "average" wedding budgets are not accurate because they factor in elopements. The Knot's published average does not get you anywhere close to the weddings they publish in their magazines. Some couples stick to their budget. Most couples go over. Some couples triple it. Knowing where you stand financially and having this discussion early is very important. Marriage is all about communication!

4- Determine your ideal guest list. You can have an A list and a B list if you are unsure or are consider a very small vs larger wedding. Are you going to have children at your wedding? What do you consider a "child"- under 21, 18 or 8? Set a rule and STICK TO IT. Your siblings can be exempt if you want them to be. What is your rule on plus ones? Proper etiquette dictates that 1. If they are living together you should extend the invitation to both people. 2. If you are inviting a couple and would invite both people still, even if they broke up, you should send them seperate invitations if they are not living together. This might get me in trouble but in the majority of situations, if you have not seen them, or at least made an effort to see them, in the last five years- they shouldn't be on your invitation list.

5- Reach out to planners in that area who offer consultations. Find one who can give general guidance on budget and expectations to make sure they are in line. You might hire this planner for full service planning. You might decide that partial planning is all you need. Please do this BEFORE you book a venue. I don’t want you to go “venue poor” because you thought your venue fee was the largest fee- it’s not. This is especially true if you are considering any sort of destination wedding or you are the first in your "group" to get married. I promise, even if the consultation costs a fee, it is worth it!!! Different areas will have different factors to consider. For example, on Nantucket, it's important to note island celebration weekends, like the Daffodil Festival, because accommodations for your guests will be more expensive and limited in availability. Holiday weekends will have three night minimums.

Photo by Dana Cubbage Photography

Bonus 6th item:

Determine your priorities. For some couples it’s the guest list. For others it’s the venue. Will you find a venue that fits your full guest list or will you create your guest list off of how many people fit at your venue? For others it’s the band or photographer and your date is based on their availability. Every couple has different priorities. You book your vendors in the order of importance to your specific wedding needs and priorities. For example, on Nantucket if you need a tent, transportation or restrooms we book those first because there are limited options available on island. Every location comes with its own unique requirements and only a local planner is going to know what those requirements are.

Lastly, do not forget that your wedding is a celebration of your relationship and your decision to spend the rest of your lives together. It should be the celebration YOU want it to be. It doesn't have to look like Pinterest or your friends wedding. It should look and feel like your wedding.

Photo by Adriana Rivera

Happy planning!

Karina Crockett

Magnolia Affairs

Nantucket Wedding Planning & Design